I was reading an article in my Babytalk magazine about parenting tips, and I came along something that really got me thinking. Ed Christophersen, Ph.D., author of six parenting books said "I think we have to take a real intellectual position against [parenting like our parents], because otherwise it's like the default settings on the computer-you just go right into it."
Which made me think, "why?" Why are SO many people against parenting like their parents? As a small child I always felt safe and loved, and was always respectful of others. During the teenager years when I was "supposed" to hate my mother, I hung out with her and my grandmother on the weekends more than I did my friends sometimes. I never rebelled because I had nothing to rebel against. I didn't lie, sneak out, or blow off school, but I never felt like she was MAKING me behave that way. I just wanted to be "good" for her because I liked her.
Now I know that some people had it very difficult. I know there are some awful parents out there. But should there really be a movement to erase from the parenting handbooks everything that our parents did. I should hope not.
2 comments:
and really, i think that is part of the problem -- people aren't parenting like our parents did. when we were kids, i was never afraid of guns in school, or any of that madness.
the ridiculous amount of violence among kids and all the other issues that go with it - drug abuse, sex, smoking, drinking, 500 person fights at the mall -- they all go back to a lack of parenting.
i now totally understand why my parents did what they did when i was a kid/teen - they kept me safe because it was their job! i want to keep my girls at home and home school them and not allow them to get in a car til they're 25.
parents are supposed to PARENT. it's a full-time, 24/7, 365, rest of your life kind of job.
[sorry about the rant...].
I LOVE that someone else is passionate about this as well!!!!
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