Thursday, November 17, 2011

O.C.D. and P.T.S.D. - Who's down with O.P.P?

Therapy yesterday has left my head swimming, but I'm going to try to put a couple thoughts together and keep this journey documented for myself.

We already knew that I have OCD, but the new psychiatrist confirmed it and also threw in a side of PTSD. This would be the reason why I NEVER calm down; why I'm on high alert 24 hours a day. I'm not going to dwell. I'm finished with dwelling. This psychiatrist that I met yesterday really clicked with me and it is just time to begin moving forward. We will put together an action plan in a couple weeks, but she has already given me a few assignments.

1. Delete emails. I have been hoarding child development emails since Athena was born. I've not been able to delete them as I'm afraid that if I do something awful will befall the ladies. There's a tiny rational area of my brain that know that this is typical OCD "Magical Thinking," but I just couldn't make myself do it. She wanted me to go home and get them all deleted. I WILL do it today.

2. Attend family Thanksgiving celebrations. I'm not allowed to duck out of anything with my immediate family for the coming holidays. I must allow my children to see and play with their cousin, GERMS BE DAMNED! Who's got a Xanax?

So here I am. The cliche first day of the rest of my life, right? Let's go delete some emails.

8 comments:

the grumbles said...

i'm so proud of you!! HIT DELETE. i know you can do it.

k said...

DELETE AWAY! You got this. You are a good mother.

Nadja said...

WTF, new gmail?! Now that I actually want to delete some emails, I can't figure out how to do it. Send help!

Wendy said...

This is awesome! Delete away! Eat turkey!

Ky • twopretzels.com said...

Did you figure it out?

DELETE.

Conquer this bee-yotch.

the corbett kid. said...

hope your deleting spree went well. xo

Nadja said...

Well THAT took way too long to figure out. I use to think I was smart...

wrestling kitties said...

Way to go and goodbye emails!!

It is awesome you are doing this, I can't wait to read about how it goes....you can SO do this!