Tuesday, December 6, 2011

I use to be a Judgey McJudgerson

Back in the days when I was a young, carefree gal working as a Realtor, I visited many family homes. I couldn't believe the crap people let their kids do to their houses. Had they no pride in home ownership? Were they raising little savage beasts? I just couldn't imagine.

I'd go for a listing appointment and ask for a tour. We'd start in the living room and stuffing would be coming out of their disheveled couch. (OMG! Get some decent furniture in this place!! You're not college students!) Move on to the kitchen and see all the pans on the floor and paint chipping off the cupboards, maybe a couple stickers worked in on the floor and walls (Sigh.) Down the hallway we'd find crayon scribbles on the wall. (Have you heard of discipline and a Magic Eraser?) Then in the bedroom 50 Smurf stickers would be stuck to the closet door. (Heathens. Downright heathens.)

I'm sure you know where I'm going with this.

I'm now the proud owner of a house, a preschooler, and a toddler. Humble pie? I've eaten it. We've been through 3 couches. Our current one looks like this:

Here we can see Zofia ripping the cushion off the couch
AND jamming my digital camera down there. A toddler double whammy.

Next we have the kitchen cupboards. That's a Dora sticker on the drawer
and the chipping paint is from repeated child-proof door break-ins.

I'm SO proud of Athena's penmanship. I just wish it wasn't on the wall.

Aaaaaaaand the closet door. It's like the universe told them specifically to do this.

I've learned to accept that I might get to have nice things again in the future when the kids are teenagers or something... then I remember that my parents had to throw a couch away because my 17 year old brother's dirty head made it smell so bad.

Nice things when we're retired then. Fingers crossed!


Written Permission said...

Then you'll have grandkids writing on the walls with crayons and putting stickers everywhere, and the circle of life continues. :)

Lesson: Buy a no-kids-allowed summer home?

the grumbles said...

my parents were VERY strict about keeping the house nice (which i guess was easy because i was a boring only child) but even *I* did the stickers on the closet door thing. what's with that??? stickers everywhere!

Backwards Amber said...

I was pretty good about staying neat as a little kid. My toddler seems to be the same. That said, I totally defaced my room as a teenager - why oh why did I think drawing all over the wall with Sharpies was a good idea?

Ky • twopretzels.com said...

I used to judge, too.

I realize now that we are not destined for nice things.

We're destined for be-dazzled things. With stickers all over them.

Sarah said...

Oh no. I love stickers. I now realize the folly in that.... I'm doomed.

Masked Mom said...

Either my five-year-old daughter or my six-year-old niece wrote "Pashion for fashion" on the dresser I inherited from my great grandmother...in permanent marker. (OF COURSE it was permanent marker.) They are seventeen and eighteen now and neither of them has as yet confessed/ratted the other out. And I still wince every time I see it--not least because of the spelling error.