(I'm still blogging from my phone. Bear with me.)
When I found out I was pregnant with Zofia, many of you recall how petrified I was. I greatly feared that I could never love another like Athena, and also that Athena would be fraught with jealousy. The good news? Athena has never once shown even a hint of jealousy. The bad news? Dearest baby sister Zofia has... and it's bad. If I hug, kiss, or cuddle Athena, zofia loses.her
mind. She screams, kicks, thrashes, and wedges herself between us clutching my breasts as if they might be stolen from her.
Athena use to think it was funny. She use to laugh as her sister alligator death-rolled between us and went about her business. Then something happened. Last night when zofia did her typical stiff-arm move and began nursing, athena's lip started quivering. Then her face crumpled. Then she wailed. Oh guys, she wailed. "Mama! Mama why can't you just hug me? Please hug me mama! I need you.
Then my heart broke into a million little pieces.
How do I do this? How do I give them both all my love yet make sure no one feels rejected or cast aside again? This is so hard, man. So hard.
I need some good mama advice.