Friday, November 12, 2010

Sometimes in life you've gotta eat some rocks.

Random fact about me: I'm a cake dropper.

It's a pretty severe affliction. Hand me a cake and chances are I'm going to drop it. Cupcakes, cream pies, good ol' fashioned cakes... they all hit the ground with a tasty splatter.

I was just reminiscing about when I worked at a coffee shop and all the birthday fun that was had there. My coworkers helped me bake a cake for Louis' birthday, which in itself was stupid since he hates cake.

As a notorious cake-dropper I was nervous taking it out the door. Success!

Drive it home. Score!

Now this is where I went wrong. Not only am I a cake-dropper I'm also a one-tripper. I will hang things from every available appendage and pile crap on my head before I make two damn trips from the car. No way Jose. I can get this shit in one! Even while carrying a cake.

Um, no I can't! I told you! I'm a cake dropper.

Smash it goes on the porch. ARGH! ASSFACE!

Know what I did? I got a fork and ate most of it before Louis got home. Sure, there were some bites with rocks in it, but isn't that just the way life is? Pretty good with a few hard bites.


Tim Schaffer said...

HILARIOUS! Love the your descriptions remind me of Seinfeld. "One Tripper" and "Cake dropper" LMAO!

SassyTimes said...

So funny! I love how you relate it to life...

Written Permission said...

Ha! Loved this. My husband is a champion one-tripper, and he has given me the bug. (The man has been known to hang up to 30 full plastic bags from one arm, hold a 20-pack of paper towels with the other, balance a 30-pack of toilet paper on TOP of the paper towels, a gallon of distilled water in each fist and a bag of chips in his mouth. And then he uses his foot to close the trunk.) You both impress me.

Nadja said...

When it comes time to close the trunk I turn into some sort of kung fu master and get my leg up there to close it. HOO-AH! Groceries I OWN YOU!

Iris Took said...

Assface is classic.

Good for you for still eating perfectly good cake.

wrestling kitties said...

HAHAHAHA! You are awesome!