Mmmmm.... my foot tastes scrumptious.

While cleaning out our linen closet, not only did I find plenty of drugs that expired during the Clinton administration, I also stumbled upon my brush belt from my days as a makeup artist. It got me all reminiscent of the time where I actually left the house, talked to adults, and wore makeup and fancy clothes. A time where I was "Nadja" instead of just "mommy."

Speaking of being Nadja...

You'd think that someone with a name so similar to the word "nauseous" would be extra sensitive to others with, ahem, different names. As I was looking through my old work stuff I thought of the time that I had to ring a transaction for a fellow makeup artist. She was making a purchase for her mother and needed me to look up her mother's credit account.

Her: "I'll just spell her name for you and you type it in."
Me: "Okilly dokilly."
Her: "D-O-N-G..."
(I give her a smirk and one-eyed glance.)
Her: "S-U-K."
Me: GUFFAW!!! "Very funny! I typed the whole thing in!"
She raises her eyebrow at me. "What's so funny?"
Me: "Seriously, funny. I fell for it and typed the whole thing in. What's her name." (Why isn't she laughing? She's good at this game.)
Her: "That IS her name. My mother is Japanese. I'm Japanese. Her name is pronounced "Dung Sook."

Unfortunately the ground did not, in fact, swallow me up like I was praying. I apologized profusely, gave her her items, then rolled around on the floor in stupid agony.

Moral of this story? Be kind to all the Nauseas, Dong Suks, and Colon (sic) Powells because that REALLY is their name. You don't want to look like and ass like me now do you?

How a WAHM's phone conversation goes...

"Hello! Thank you for calling XYZ Realty, how can I help you?" - Friendly Secretary

"MOM! SPONGEBOB IS ON! I'M HUNGRY! WHERE'S MY FOOOOOOD!!!!" - Athena

"Yes, um..." -Me

"MOM! Sissy pooped! IT STINKS SO BAD!!!!" -Athena

"... sorry. I'd like to set an appointment to see 1234 Foreclosure Lane on... {inaudible due to following statement} -Me

"MOM! Does Spongebob have a penis???"

"I'm sorry, when did you want to show that listing?" - Slightly Taken Aback Secretary

"I'd like to show it..." {inaudible} -Me

"MOM! Why does Dad have buttcheeks???" -Athena

"Uh, I'd like to show it..." -Me

"You know, MA'AM, you can set these appointments online..." -Unfriendly Secretary

"MOM! Watch me jump from the couch to the table!!

"Uh, ok, thanks I'll do that... OMG ATHENA DON'T!!!" -Me

{crash boom SCREAM!}

{click. Dial tone}

Sigh....

*I'd like to assure you that no part of this is an exaggeration*

Real Estate is Serious Business...

... so Ms. Bee was happy to play for a while, but then it was all work work work for her.

But seriously, it was great. I actually talked to buyers and submitted offers and whatnot! Athena just cruised around like she owned the place. They were letting her beat the crap out of a keyboard, mess up papers, and they put out as many toys as a daycare... I'm not kidding. She kept peeking in at the broker and then when he would get up she'd spin his chair around super fast. All in all, she thought it was the bee's knees.

I'm Nervous!

I'm actually going to start doing "grown-up" work tomorrow! I'm going to use what I spent hell-ish time in school for!

The real estate company that I use to work for is actually bombarded with work and they asked me back. I even get to take Ms. Bee with me and set up a perfect little space for us. But I've been doing makeup for the last couple of years... not exactly straining my brain. I feel nervous actually doing something of substance.

Yikes.

Wish me luck and hope that I don't get them sued. (I've only been threatened with it in the past.)